What the Erotic Asks of Us: Not Safety, but Love

NOTE: This reflection is written by Po’Chop, artist, teacher, and co-founder of House of the Lorde, following recent iterations of the workshop Uses of the Erotic: Burlesque as Power.

On January 11 and 18, we hosted our workshop Uses of the Erotic: Burlesque as Power.

This workshop has taken many forms over time, but at its core is Audre Lorde’s iconic essay Uses of the Erotic: The Erotic as Power and a practice of collective reading, reflection, and discussion.

There is a palpable energy that ignites when Lorde’s words are brought into a room. Her language does not sit quietly. It moves through the body and asks something of us.

What sacred knowledge does your body hold?

Burlesque is often diluted into an art form of panel skirts, glamour, and performative sexiness. A spectacle meant to be consumed. Entertainment.

But for us, burlesque is more expansive.

As Jo “Boob” Weldon, burlesque icon and legend, names burlesque as the act of undressing.

For us, burlesque is not simply the removal of clothing, but a reveal of our erotic power.

For us, burlesque is the undressing of the physical body and the restraints that ask us to perform gender, sexuality, and identity in ways that are legible, palatable, and entertaining.

This is why embodying Lorde’s understanding of the erotic offstage becomes essential. If we are to lay bare what is true for us onstage, we must know it intimately in our solitude. Like the yellow packet Lorde references in her essay, the erotic must be allowed to color all parts of our lives.

To fully experience the colors illuminated by our erotic requires attunement.

It does not allow us to shrink, ignore, or numb ourselves in the face of fear.

Our erotic knowledge, in all of its chaos, mystery, and uncertainty, asks us to feel deeply before we rush to name or explain it.

As a small gift for those who participated in Uses of the Erotic: Burlesque as Power, we recorded a short meditation called Letting the Color Spread: An Attunement Practice. A short offering to encourage folks to tune in and grow their capacity for living an erotic-led life. You can access this 7-minute guided listening practice for $5.

Enter the Practice

In the recent iteration of Uses of the Erotic: Burlesque as Power, our discussions turned toward questions of safety. The desire for safety that might allow us the vulnerability necessary to tap into that dark and ancient part of ourselves that Lorde calls the erotic.

We reflected on safety as an illusion within our current American systems. We spoke about maroon communities creating pockets of collective protection within the ongoing dangers of the plantation.

And then Raging Blister offered, "perhaps instead of safety, I mean love."

From there, we wondered if instead of chasing safety as something guaranteed or static, we might understand safety as love.

Love is active, as bell hooks teaches us.

The erotic and love are collaborators.

Lorde teaches us that the erotic is love personified. A force that calls us back into feeling, discernment, and relationship with ourselves and with others.

And so yes. Love, for self and for others, is necessary for us to live an erotic-led life. Love is necessary for us if we are to stand physically and emotionally bare on stages and allow our erotic charge to fill and move a room.

This is the work we return to at House of the Lorde. A life practice of being radically present and honest with ourselves and each other.

Uses of the Erotic: Burlesque as Power returns February 22 for an extended four-week session on Sundays from 3:30 to 4:45 PM. This longer container gives us time to settle into the text, build collective capacity, and practice moving from our erotic together.